Friday, August 31, 2018
Monday, August 20, 2018
A Final Note
Although
my culture teaches me that cycles have beginnings and ends, my
culture's science is being confronted with what it describes as proof
of a different kind of reality. In this reality, everything is
connected and change is the only constant. As theoretical physics and
cosmology push further into smaller and larger realms respectively,
notions of finite systems and closed loops start to disappear as
viable models to describe our world. We are left with the ideas of
constant change and fundamental interconnectedness.
As
I ponder these ideas, I am left to consider my own flow. There are
times when an eddy in a stream can seem like the stream itself. Side
currents create motion that seems like the actual river, but are not.
In order to insure that I am not stuck in an eddy, I remain on the
lookout for obstacles and challenges that exist only in the main
current. When I don't see them, I know I have to push off from where
I am in search of the risks and gifts only the real River can
provide.
The
practice of writing these daily reflections has become an eddy for
me, so I have chosen today, the end of the third year of writing, to
push off from this comfortable bank, and back into the main stream. I
know that I can't find what is waiting there for me till I do, for
that is what faith is about. Thanks to everyone who has followed
along. I have appreciated your comments, input, and
attention. I wish you all the best in your many adventures. I look
forward to seeing you all along the way.
Sunday, August 19, 2018
Breeze
As
I sit outside today, the freshening Wind rises in the West. It gets
me thinking about how the Wind never really stops blowing. It
changes, but the air is always moving, even if it is just the air I
am exhaling. The breeze does not start and stop, it does not begin or
end. Sometimes it is just so gentle that I don't notice it. Today, I
will be paying attention to time when I think something is ending,
when, in fact, it is just changing.
Saturday, August 18, 2018
Cycles
My
culture describes cycles as having beginnings, middles, and ends. It
further prioritizes middles. I am invited to avoid beginnings because
they are sometimes equated with stress. I am invited to avoid endings
because they are sometimes described only as loss. Without endings
there can be no new beginnings, and my experience has taught me that
the possible stress and loss can be made meaningful through how I
choose to take up these new possibilities. Today, I will be paying
attention to the invitations I receive form my culture, and noticing
when they do and don't resonate with my experience.
Friday, August 17, 2018
Alarm Call
I
was so happy to hear Robin this morning, that it took me a while to
realize that I was listening to her alarm call. Once I did, I scanned
around to try to see what she was worried about. When I didn't see
anything obvious, I concluded that it might be me. Today, I am
grateful to be familiar with Robin and her alarm call.
Thursday, August 16, 2018
Hawk Perspective
Cooper's
Hawk and family call out over and over in the afternoons around the
cabin. I can hear them talking to each other seemingly miles apart.
Their calls take me to a wonderful time. I am reminded of last
Summer, when they were so close and we could watch them flying off
and returning. We could see them dive bombing each other, and see the
you ng ones learning how to fly.
This
is only one perspective on the Hawk calls. I have learned that some
of our neighbors don't like the calls at all. For them, they are loud
and annoying. And then there is the perspective of Hawk. That is at
least three perspectives on one experience.
This
gets me thinking about the abundance of possible perspectives that
exist in response to any event. Each is important and valuable.
Together they represent part of the tapestry that is Life. Today, I
will be doing my best to honor all of the perspectives that show up
along my path.
Wednesday, August 15, 2018
Difference
As
I sat this morning I noticed a bright red leaf directly in front of
me on Maple tree. It was so bright that I wondered for a moment if it
was Scarlet Tanager. How beautiful it was against the green leaves on
the rest of the tree. It got me thinking about the importance of
difference. A red leaf stands out in late August, but not so much in
the middle of October. So difference isn't just about what or where
but also about when. Today, I will be noticing how when something is
makes it stand out.
Tuesday, August 14, 2018
Pear
We
have Pears that are starting to go. The darkness is starting around
the stems. It occurs to me that the stem is where the Pear starts.
From flower to fruit, the process begins at the stem. So it makes
sense that from fruit to soil, the process continues from the stem.
This gets me thinking that the progress of other things maybe isn't
so mysterious. It seems that maybe it's more about paying attention
to how things go. Maybe it's more about noticing. Maybe if I spend
more time paying attention, some outcomes wouldn't seem so
surprising.
Monday, August 13, 2018
Morning
During
the warmer months, when there is no fire to tend, I can sit on the
Western porch to eat my breakfast. This cool morning reminds me that
the Autumn is coming, and I am grateful fro the time I have outside
enjoying the morning.
Sunday, August 12, 2018
Blueberry
The
Blueberry bushes in front of the cabin are not mature enough to
produce lots of berries. The ones they do produce ripen slowly, a few
at a time. It occurred to me this morning that, although they don't
ripen all at the same time, it is possible to understand why they
ripen when they do. The fact that there are one or two berries on
each bush every time I go out to look is not random. It probably has
something to do with things like the amount it rains, how much sun
they get, and where they are on the bush.
I
don't know exactly, but I realized this morning that I could know.
All I would have to do is take the time to hang out with the berry
bushes and watch what happens and when. Keeping in mind that what the
bushes did this year is slightly different from what they did last
year and what they will do next year, the process of really
understanding how the berries ripen would require a commitment of
time. The gifts would be substantial, however. I
realize
that this would be a reclamation of knowledge. I know my ancestors
had this knowledge. It was handed down to them from their Elders and
they passed it along. I believe that there are probably people still
living who possess this knowledge, but I am no longer in the line
through which it is passed.
This
gets me thinking about the knowledge my culture invites me to carry
and pass on. Knowledge about money and career, possessions and
status. I'm not sure how this will serve me when no one remembers how
the berries grow.
Saturday, August 11, 2018
Gifts
As
the Sun rose this morning, it shone through, under the cloud cover.
The shafts of light created a bright glow that set off the steel
gray clouds above. The effect lasted only for a minute before the Sun
rose above the clouds. This got me thinking about the gifts that
exist in every moment. The Sun brings gifts, the clouds bring gifts.
I just have to be present to receive them.
Friday, August 10, 2018
Calm Action
I
sit and listen to the sounds of the woods in the early morning, I
hear the breeze. I hear the birds. I hear the insects. Though I know
that there is much going on that I can not hear, what I hear sounds
to me like calm. Then it occurs to me that there is calm in the
woods, even with the things that are going on that I can not hear. I
start to understand that there does not have to be inactivity in
order for there to be calm. There is quiet in noise, the space
between the sound waves. There is light in darkness. There is calm in
action.
Thursday, August 9, 2018
Beetle Squeak
There
is a beetle in the trees to the North of the cabin. I know because of
the sound he makes. He sounds like the squeak trees make when their
limbs rub against each other. If I didn't know it was Beetle, I would
think it was Tree. I only know about Beetle because I heard this
sound on a windless afternoon, and wondered how Tree could be
squeaking when she was not moving. I asked a friend who knows about
such things, and he told me about Beetle. I am struck by the
importance of noticing. If I hadn't noticed the sound of Beetle and
wondered where the sound was coming from, I would never have known
about him. Now I can hear him squeaking even if there is a breeze.
This leaves me wondering excitedly about all I have yet to notice.
Wednesday, August 8, 2018
Worry Invitations
As
I sit and listen this morning, I hear a Beetle chirping in a tree
Northwest of the cabin. As I do, Cat Bird, and a pair of Cardinals
join me. I notice their actions and see no ambivalence. They act.
They fly, they hunt, the kill, they sing. They don't hesitate. They
don't balk. I am struck by this, and it gets me thinking about the
power of actions. I can accept. I can forgive. I can be grateful. I
can serve. I can ponder. These are actions. These are things I can
do. Today I will be paying attention to the actions I take and
noticing when doubt and worry invite me to hesitate.
Tuesday, August 7, 2018
Humming Bird
Absent
but implicit in the flower of Bee Balm is Humming Bird. Humming Bird
is the only bird that can reach the nectar at the base of the long
conical petals. Humming Bird's long beak and tongue reach into places
no other bird can reach. The flower implies the bird.
Saturday, August 4, 2018
Safe
Sitting
on the plane home from a recent trip, the guy next to me asked, “You
wanna see something fun?” He immediately began pushing virtual
buttons on his mini computer. It took a while for him to find the
file, but when he did, an image appeared. On the screen was a person
and a paddle board. About twenty feet behind the board was a dark
shadow.
It
turned out that there was more than one photo. In fact there was a
whole sequence. In each one, the dark shadow got closer and closer to
his board. “I'm the Clueless Paddle Board Guy,” he said, as he
described what happened to produce these photographs. He told me he
was out on his board near a beach off the coast of Massachusetts when
a drone showed up over his head. He said he thought it was out there
looking for sharks since a seal had been taken there the day before.
Thinking no more of it, he returned to the beach. When he did, he was
greeted by the drone driver. It was then that he learned why the
drone had been so interested in him. He stood on the beach stunned as
the drone pilot showed him pictures of himself trailed by a dark
shadow identified by the drone flier as a twelve foot Great White
Shark. He told me the drone operator had shared the photos and that
they had gone viral. That's when he was dubbed “The Clueless Paddle
Boarder.”
We
talked for a while about his fifteen minutes of fame as he recounted
the titles of the magazines he had appeared in. I think it was People
Magazine that had introduced the idea that he was “clueless.” He
told me he didn't like being thought of that way, and we laughed
about creating memes with his photos, but as we did, I kept coming
back to one thing; he was alive.
One
of the scariest parts in the sequence of photos is the one that shows
that, after Shark passes him, it turns back, perhaps for another
look. We talked about how surf boards can look like Seals from under
water and how so many people have theorized that this is one of the
reason why surfers get attacked. This lead him to tell me about the
kind of board he uses. It's shorter than most paddle boards and not
as buoyant. That means he has to be even more present as he is
paddling. Otherwise, he will lose his balance and fall. As he spoke
about the focus and attention required for him to do what he was
doing, I started to struggle with the idea that he was clueless. In
fact it seemed that his was just the opposite of clueless, and quite
clued into what he was doing.
He
spoke about how much he loved paddle boarding, and how that morning
was the perfect combination of wake and waves. He had been waiting
for just such a day, and was so happy that it had finally arrived. He
said he was aware that Sharks were in the area, but decided to go out
anyway. That's when he spoke about how important he though it was to
live your life like you're dying rather than always worrying about
what might kill you. This reminded me of the time I asked by a friend
of mine if I would be devastated if she died. I told her that of
courses I would, but it would be easier for me if I knew she died
doing something she loved; something that mattered to her. Paddle
boarding and what he experienced when I did it mattered to him.
It
turned out his name was Roger, and he told that, in retrospect he
probably shouldn't have gone out. He knew what he was doing was
risky, but I kept coming back to the fact that he was alive. It was
when he stated to ponder out loud why the life guards hadn't raised
the alarm when the drone flier saw what was going on that I said,
“But you're an alive person.”
It
was then that we started to wonder what would have happened to him if
the folks on the beach had tried to warn him about the Shark.
Remembering the scene from the movie Jaws when the Sharif panics,
rushing everyone out of the water only to find that what he thought
was a Shark was only two kids with a fake fin, I said sometimes raising the alarm is the
last thing you want to do. He said he didn't know how he would have
reacted. He said that he would like to believe that he would have
stayed calm, but we both shuttered thinking about what might have
happened if he hadn't. What if he lost his focus? What if his
concentration was broken? The outcome might have been quite different
from the one he was living. The only other option for him for that
morning would have been for him to remain on the beach.
All
this got me thinking about how often my culture invites me to do just
that. Every day I am invited to keep my focus on all the things that
could go wrong; All the risks I face as I live my life.
Metaphorically, my culture invites me to pay far more attention to
the possibility that there is a shark in the water then to consider
what I might gain from taking my paddle board out anyway. The thing
about Roger is that he was not absentmindedly blundering into the
water. He knew what he was doing. He knew how to balance on his
board. He knew how to find a wave and ride it back into the beach.
Had he known there was Great White in that water at that time, he
wouldn't have gone out, but he couldn't have known.
The
question I am left with is this: Will I stop taking my metaphoric
paddle board out into the water just because there might be Sharks or
do I go out anyway? Unfortunately, by culture's proscription is to
stay on the beach. Today, I chose to listen to my own words to my
friend, paying attention not to the possible Sharks in the water, but
the value of the experiences I have when I chose, like Roger the
perhaps not-so-clueless-paddle-board-guy, to leave the beach. I can
choose to spend my life worried about the unseen sharks that lurk
just below the surface, or I can notice the beauty of the water that
shimmers just beyond the safety of the shore.
There
will always be risks and there wall always be choices to make.
Perhaps the most important thing I learned from Roger's story came
from the fact that, even while the drone pilot was watching the Shark
circle around him, he was experiencing an amazing morning out on the
sparkling water. Sometimes what we don't know is just is impotent as
what we do. Perhaps being “clueless” about one thing is what
keeps us open to and aware of something else. Roger is an alive
person, and perhaps he is even more alive for having come so close to
a Shark he didn't even know was there.
#paddleboarderandshark
Wednesday, August 1, 2018
Knowledge
I
hear a bird call in the North woods, that I am very familiar with,
but I don't know who makes it. I am struck by this familiarity
without having a picture in my mind of the singer. I would probably
recognize the bird even though I don't know the song. This seems to
be an unspicific way of knowing, and I am left wondering about how
many other such knowledges a carry, yet to be completed.
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