I woke this morning
and my wife had already gone downstairs to feed the animals. I had
missed the dog nudging her with a quiet whimper. I had missed her
getting out of bed. I had missed the squeaky stairs. These things
usually wake me up. It's the Valerian. Not that I used any last
night, or chewed it, to be more accurate. It is in bloom., however.
Valerian is a great
sleep aid. Better, in my opinion, than home grown Chamomile. Some of
the Valerian plants that grow around the cabin are five feet high,
with flowers ten inches around. The sweet and somewhat off putting
smell wafts around the land this time of year, replacing the scent of
Wild Rose that has just gone by.
There are lots of
studies about how many people experience the effects of medicinal and
mind altering substances before they enter the body. It is well
documented how people begin to relax and unwind upon ordering their
first drink. Is it possible that simply having the Valerian at our
disposal is what gave my such deep and restful sleep?
This gets me
thinking about how I come to believe that I need some form of aid in
order to accomplish something. I used to think that, in order to
really be free, I had to take a shower before singing. I still wear
the same tee shirt when I work out, even though I don't believe it
does anything but keep me from sticking to the bench. I am wondering
if there are any other hurdles that I put between me and whatever it
is I have come to believe I need “x” to be able to do. It seems
there is so much that we are capable of that we doubt because of some
prerequisite we have been told has to come first. I am obviously not
sleeping well because I am chewing Valerian. Is it just reminding me
that I am capable of good sleep? Am I giving myself permission to
sleep because it is in bloom?
Today, I will be
looking out for roadblocks I don't even know I have put up that get
in my way. And I will be asking myself, “What are you waiting for?”
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