A guy came up to me while I was busking in Kittery yesterday. He asked if I knew where the Tributary Brewing Company was. He said is nephew was gong to be playing there. I said I didn't know where it was, and directed him to some folks who might.
After I was done playing, I thought about going over to the brewing company to see the band. I drove over to the parking lot of the bar, and reconsidered. I wanted to go in, but I was nervous about going into an unfamiliar place. I left.
On the way home I remembered something my son once told me. He said he never wanted to look back and wish he had done something in stead of doing it. So he does things, even though he might have to push himself. He said this was how he was gong to avoid regrets. I turned the truck around and went back to the bar.
I listened to a couple of songs. The band was really good. Not my thing, though. Dead head jam band sort of stuff. I decided to go home.
As I walked out the door of the bar, a warm evening breeze washed over me. At the same time a wonderful feeling of calmness settled on me like a soothing blanket.
This week one of my folks told me about the idea of “doing it anyway, even if you don't want to.” She said it was one of the most important things she ever learned from a therapist (she didn't learn it from me, by the way). Walking out of the bar, I think I got a sense of why it is such an important idea for her. Even though nothing really memorable happened in the bar, I don't think I'll soon forget the feeling of freedom I felt walking back to my truck to head home.